need a new life

i'm moved to write, but i'm just not sure what about. work is really stressing me out now. i feel like i've made some bad decisions and i'm just feeling worn down and frustrated. here i go again. i'm getting that feeling yet again like all the jobs past and want to get out. i've decided that if i leave this job, then i have to make a career change because i'm tired of switching jobs on a yearly basis. i'm really getting into my yoga classes, so maybe sometime soon and can take a teacher training. i just don't know what else i'd want to do. theoretically, with a law degree, many doors should open for me, but the options are so overwhelming that i sometimes feel that being a lawyer is all there is for me. and that is a sad thought indeed.

but, it's not all bad. i've learned so much and pushed myself harder than i ever have. i know i'm here for a purpose, but i just wish i knew what the destination was. i guess we never do.

tra la la

so, it's been an insane time lately. my dad has been in the hospital for the past 2 weeks. he finally was released this past saturday, so he's getting better but we were all really unsure about that for quite a while, himself included. it makes me much more aware of his mortality, which i don't like to think about too much. but, fortunately, i can set it aside now for the time being.

while i was stressing about my dad, work has been on major overload. everyone wants something from me - one of the beauties of being a lawyer. one of my big juvenile cases got resolved and i have another set for jury trial next week. i'm pretty sure it's going to get resolved before then, but the stress of dealing with it is tiring. anyway, trying to find tranquility lately has been difficult. i'm trying to keep up with my yoga even though i'm so drained by the end of the day. i keep telling myself i'm working towards something, but i'm still kind of stumped about what it is.

dragging along

i'm taking a break from work and hanging out with my pups during my lunch break. i love that i finally live close enough to work to do this. work is overwhelming me, as usual. there just isn't enough time to do each of my jobs thoroughly. if i was just the juvenile prosecutor, that would be fantstic, but i have these other responsibilities tacked on to that and they need just as much time. it gets hard, but at least i can say i earn my money.

tonight i must go to yoga. i've blown off my classes for almost 3 weeks now and i just don't know why. i tell myself it's laziness, but after my creativity circle i'm trying not to think that way. for some reason, i'm talking myself out of going, but not tonight.

i'm now on a ballroom dancing kick. watching dancing with the stars might be to blame. unfortunately, one of the problems with living between 2 major cities is that doing anything in either takes a long time. there's a place in austin that looks like fun, but that means a 45 minute commute to and from the studio. on saturday, that's fine, but after work is kind of rough. i so wish i lived in the city. another goal for myself, i guess.

more lavender

so, i've really been on a lavender kick lately, and i'm starting to get a gardening itch too. now, i've never been a green thumb kind of gal, but then again i've never lived in a house before (well, except my parents' of course). our backyard is so empty. with the exception of a small baby tree smack dab in the center, there is nothing. i'm really thinking that i want lavender somewhere in the yard. would this not be beautiful?

grand jury

this week has been crazy! working late every night, running around all day. but, i got to take my first case to the grand jury this past wednesday! i had no idea what to expect, as i've never watched one before. but it went fantastically and i had lots of fun doing it. i wonder if i could find a job where all i do is take cases to the grand jury. i doubt it.

anyway, right now i'm vegging out on the couch, watching to dog whisperer, and drinking a glass of wine. life's good for now.